everything or nothing.

i should have lsitend.
i should have listend the that little voice in my head,
warning me,
"you'll only get hurt"
"it's not worth it"
"she doesnt really like you"
"you see the way she doesn't hug you back anymore?"
"she hates you"
i should have seen it coming,
the knife in her hand,
at the ready,
ready to stab me right in the heart,
while i stare her in the eyes.
if she feels no pain well good on her.
but i do.
and this hurts so much.
it started with a simple question.
and has ended in a tangled heart,
a new question,
a new problem to solve.
how will i deal with this..
the shiny metal sinks in,
its pretty poison numbs the pain,
but not nearly enough.
i want you to stay,
i dont know what im going to do without you.
but i guess thats life.
its just really painful.
i dont know how to soothe the pain this time.
goodbye.
forever.