implossible mind puzzle

as i looked in the mirror
i screamed out inside
i cried
i couldnt controll my body as threw myself onto the bed.
so confused about what i have become.
"leave me" i screamed
"what did you do to her"
"where is she?!"
"stop controlling me"
"let me be free again"
"where is the old me?!... the happy me"
i fell to the floor
a complete mess
no better than when i started
more trapped than ever.